25 Days of Healing

Hi friends!

A little life update for the mid-year of 2025.

In my last blog post, i processed with you how overwhelmed i felt with the grief that came from losing my grandmother early February 1 this year. That has been exactly 6 months ago today. This grief led to even more griefs—to name a few in the next four months i underwent challenges that touched the core of my pain: relational breakdown after the other, feelings of betrayal, loss of home yet again, separation anxiety, moving houses which meant moving my life and belongings twice, false accusations, offenses, and loss of a sense of belonging and community. I was stripped off with what felt like half of my life here in Cebu in a span of months. While the other half stayed in tact and have been just enough support when i could no longer stand on my own. God sent just enough support at the right time to encourage me and teach me how to walk again.

I was brought to a deep dark valley and led to a wilderness season. 11 years professing my faith in Christ and following the Lord. I found myself in a huge transition in my journey. I almost felt...lost.

Then came my 25 days of traveling the Philippines (Davao, Baguio, Manila) and Malaysia (Penang) with a morning layover at Vietnam and a half day in Kuala Lumpur. Who would have known how much this leap of faith to heal outside the city will bring forth something entirely new for God to fill the huge gap that was in my life.

In Davao, I found healing with my aunt's family and caught up with my cousins and uncle who i have not seen for 11 years since 2014.

In Manila, I sought for God's touch in the "Activate: Holy Spirit!" conference hosted by River of Life where I came to hear Vlad Savchuk speak. God encountered me in the worship, messages and the altar calls and He led me to a powerful and direct prayer which supernaturally and completely took away the grief i felt for my grandmother's sudden death. He even gave me time to spend with family and friends. Divine connections came back after 11 years of being disconnected. God gave me favor upon favor, blessing upon blessing. I also got to visit three different church fellowships on the Sundays within my trip where God touched me powerfully and gave me confirmations of my current season and direction.

In Baguio, I found solace and rest in the cool weather, the hospitality of the YWAM Baguio community, safe friendships, and the intimate times i had with the Lord in the secret place. It was in Baguio that i heard the Lord speak to me about Malaysia.

I was invited by a missionary friend of mine who i used to work with at the Cebu House of Prayer to join them in Malaysia for Vigan House of Prayer staff's retreat. I initially did not intend to go but when the Lord spoke to me about Malaysia and placed PenHOP on my instagram feed, it clicked on my mind that her invite was somehow related to PenHOP. To my excitement, when i confirmed with her that they would connect with the house of prayer in Penang, i knew that the Lord was leading me to go. PenHOP had been in one of my bucket lists of places to visit with the Lord.

As i prayed, He impressed me to invite two of my friends from our local church to join me. We gave about 3 days to pray and got our confirmation by then. The Lord was leading us to travel to Penang together. We went through spiritual warfare booking our flights last minute (12 days prior to the trip) but by God's grace and providence, we were able to secure our flights. What initially was intended to be a 5 day stay at Penang became a 5 day travel and transit from Cebu, Vietnam, Penang, Kuala Lumpur, Manila, and back to Cebu. But we took the 2 days in Penang as a gift from God that we would be able to make it there with the team from VigHOP while being able to enjoy our short transit time in the other places.

In the 21 days of my healing journey in the Philippines, God worked deeply in my heart to give me the spiritual heart surgery i needed.

In the 1 week i was in Cebu in between the 25 day trip, i found comfort in the silence of staying at home and fasting social interactions to process my trip and quiet my mind as well as join my local church in the corporate prayer and fasting.

In the 4 day vision trip to Vietnam and Malaysia, God has deposited in me once again His heart for the nations.

As much as i enjoyed doing tourist-things like buying souvenirs, local grocery, having instagrammable photos, and eating local food, the highlight and commencement of my 25-days healing journey was definitely in the Penang House of Prayer where God spoke to me in Daniel 6 very clearly and where He showed me his face in what feels like the clearest vision i had of Jesus as a Lamb that sat enthroned and was crowned with many crowns. As i was gazing on this pure and spotless Lamb in His holiness and innocence, the worship leader then transitions to the song with the lyrics that goes:

Worthy is the Lamb

seated on the throne

crown you now with many crowns

You reign victorious

I was already bawling in the prayer room even before this vision because of the tangible presence and glory of God. But bawled even more when i saw this vision. I think i just had a glimpse into the Revelation 5 reality. Something that I have been asking God for since my time in the prayer room in Medicine Hat, Canada, in 2017.

That vision and the worship followed me back home to the plane rides, my house, when i'm driving and just doing the most mundane things like while washing the dishes or eating. The glory and presence of God gets stronger when i play specific worship songs. Worship helps me remember how He looked like in my vision.

To sum up my healing journey with the Lord this year and as i sought out for healing over the past 9 years since i entered missions in 2016, i came to this conclusion of what healing is to me:

Therapy cannot bring healing, it can teach one to cope and to be self-aware.

Time cannot bring healing, it pushes us to make the choice to either cope or to run away.

True healing is found...

in seeing the face of God.

In the brokenness, He has deposited so much in me that i do not yet have the language for. But whatever gifts were deposited, it takes time to unpack. I'm expectant, excited, and humbled, Thank you, Father. You truly give good gifts to those you call your children.

Until the next revelations.

In His love,

Christy